I’ve been away for a loooong time! Sorry, dear readers – I have a really good excuse this time! I’m nearing the end of the first year of my Masters programme, and I kinda accidentally got promoted at work. So busy times!
Things are generally well with me; in fact, my beloved Nomad and I had a little private commitment ceremony a few weeks ago, honouring our relationship and the direction it’s taken and making promises to each other for our shared future together. I have a beautiful custom-made commitment bracelet which I never take off.
Anyway, without further ado, it’s a lighthearted post to get me back into blogging. The deep and serious stuff will come soon, I can assure you!
Five Ways In Which Polyamory Is Like Grad School
1. It’s not for the faint of heart.
A complex and non-traditional relationship structure, much like an advanced programme of study, is a major undertaking. This is not beginner level stuff, it’s wonderful but it’s hard. Anyone going in should do so with their eyes open and knowing exactly what’s in store and how much work the desired outcome will require.
2. It will sometimes eat your life and require you to consume copious quantities of caffeine…
…But you love it anyway.
I thrive off staying up late into the night working, even when it’s utterly exhausting. And there is little in the world I like more than staying up all night just to spend time with my Beloved and fall asleep when it’s getting light. Being rushed off your feet for much of your time is pretty much par for the course in either of these life choices (and try doing both at once! That’s a whole WORLD of fun!) (And I mean that sincerely, not sarcastically as it may read.)
3. People will ask you “how can you do that?!?”…
All. The. Time.
They’ll either look at you in awe and ask a million questions, or regale you with all the reasons why they’d never choose that path.
4. …And your answer will be something like “I couldn’t NOT do it!”
I don’t know if this is true for anyone else, but when I feel really passionately about something it is as though there is a tugging in my very soul pulling me toward that thing. I could no more give up my studies, stop writing or stop being queer and polyamorous than I could stop breathing.
5. There are times when you will want to quit… and may more times when you will be glad you didn’t.
As mentioned before, this stuff is HARD. When you’re on your third night of no sleep with that damn essay that just won’t go right, you will want to say “fuck this! I don’t need this qualification anyway!” When you’re struck with an attack of jealousy or have just broken up with someone, you will probably want to say “this would all be better if I were just monogamous!”
But when you step back and realise you followed your heart and chased your dream and worked through all the adversities in the way, you will be so very glad you stuck it out.